They say that all the things we love will come and go, and everything is just transitory. We should all be accustomed to the fact that the people and all that we hold so dearly will one day be taken away from us. I for one, believe in that fact. But I think some losses are just too soon and too painful than I expected.
I have been an animal lover for as long as I can remember. I used to have rabbits and birds, but nothing can ever encompass my admiration for dogs. I had two dogs in my younger years, and they both passed away for some natural reasons. Their departure affected me so much, that I promised myself that I won't get another pet in the near future. I'll only get one at that time when I'm ready again. A little surprise came up to me months ago when my dad took me to a pet shop. He told me to pick a puppy that I wanted and I saw a little critter, with white and light brown fur, crawling inside the cage and reaching out his paws while playing with a Persian kitten. My eyes twinkled and I excitedly pointed at the playful puppy's direction. Yes, I want him. The pet shop owner took him out of the cage, gave it to me and I carried it in my arms. The cute puppy looked at me in a shy manner and that's when I knew that I shall keep him as my pet. I fell in love with him in an instant. He owned the most beautiful pair of eyes. We took him home and we gave him COCO for a name. Oh, he's such a handsome Shih Tzu puppy. <3 His first few days in our house felt awkward. He didn't want to come out and he ate very little. On the fourth day, I was sitting at the dinner table and I felt a furry paw brush across my foot. It was him! Coco was prancing around, inviting me to play with him and so I did. He seemed to fancy my neon slippers which he kept on snatching, so I relented and gave it to him. When he got tired of playing, he barked at me and I realized he wanted food. I prepared his doggie treats which he ate with gusto. He has this cute manner of looking at me while chewing on his food. We assumed it's a way of thanking us for feeding him. My sister and I were the ones who took the task of grooming him. We gave him bubble baths, blow dried and combed his fur. He takes great pleasure in having his belly tickled by the bristles of the brush, which I do all the time. Coco brightens my day when I hug him tight as soon as I wake up. He takes away my stress from school when I hug him tighter before I sleep. He keeps me company whenever I stay up late at night just so I can finish reviewing. He's like my confidante when I'm angry or when I'm sad. He never minds the tears that fall down on my face, nor the senseless words I say about people whenever I'm annoyed. He just looks at me intently and listens.
I had plans of buying him cute clothes for Christmas. I wanted to make him my little Santa. It would be perfect on him. Most people who see Coco find him uniquely cute and handsome. Some say he's beyond extraordinary. They always say something about his eyes. That made me a very proud owner.
But all those plans have to change and those people will never see his beautiful eyes anymore.
My dad and my sister took him to the vet a week ago so that he could be given the shots he needed. When Coco got home, he was slept right away. We took it as a normal thing since vaccines can cause fever. He became a little bit playful when night came, but it's not like his usual. Tuesday came and we noticed that he wasn't touching his food. My dad took him to the vet again and he was diagnosed with low platelet count and with 39.5 degrees fever. The vet told my dad to observe Coco and bring him back if there were any changes. The days crawled on to Thursday and Coco was getting weak and his poop started to smell really bad. I kept my cool but in the inside I was freaking out. My whole family knew that something was really wrong. Friday came and Coco refused to take even a single bite of food. I had a class at 7 am so I had to leave early. As I was about to open the door, something pushed me to look back at him. He was looking at me intently, the type of look he didn't have before. I placed my bag down, went to him and scratched his head just the way he liked it. He blinked weakly and looked at me again. I was starting to quiver but I held myself together. I said, "You'll be okay soon. I'll buy you Santa clothes as soon as you get well. I love you!!" He turned away and slept. I left the house, praying intently for his recovery.
I got a text from my sister at 4pm, telling me that the vet diagnosed Coco with parvo virus. He might have acquired it from the other dogs at the clinic since it was an airborne type of disease. My heart fell and I prayed hard. I went home and saw him weaker than he ever was before. I acted normal and touched his nose and told him that he will get better. He blinked weakly and closed his eyes. I took his doggie treats, mashed it so it would be easy for him to chew it. I gave it to him but he turned away. At past 10 in the evening, as I was reviewing for my quiz the next day (which is today), I heard Coco breathing helplessly. I knelt down at his side and I knew that it's near. He was looking at me while he was lying down and I told him not to give up. I think he understood and he did his best to stand up, but his weak body didn't allow him to. My tears fell all of a sudden and I felt cold. My dad told me to go inside the room and study instead. He assured me that everything will be okay. I didn't want to leave Coco's side, but my heart just can't take the sight of him suffering. I left, stayed inside the room and prayed hard. I wasn't prepared to lose him. He's like the best friend I never had before. Half an hour passed, my dad went inside the room and I saw him teary eyed. That's when I found out that Coco's gone. Our family believed that he passed away gallantly with unfailing faith. We all knew that he fought as hard as he could, but he really had to leave us behind. I went back to my notes and tried to get my mind off things. My tears were falling continuously, and I felt my heart breaking more than it ever did before. I pushed myself to a light sleep filled with dreams about my deceased dog.
I woke up this morning, and I felt the pain as it became more concrete. He really is gone. People might say that I'm shallow, but the surge of pain that I felt was unbearable. I lost someone so dear, indeed. I didn't feel like moving but I had to. I went to school with an absent mind, puffy eyes and a broken heart. I felt thankful that I had friends to entertain me for a while, but I knew I had to face the truth once I get home. When I arrived, I saw his empty cage. He wasn't there anymore. Coco wasn't there to wag his tail, prance at me and welcome me from a tiring day at school. I felt my heart break even more.
Grief is a natural thing, and it can be overcome by people depending on their coping mechanisms. I know I will get over this grief, I just do not know when. I admit I'm too emotional, and I have bad coping mechanisms. One thing that lifts up my mood is, I know that he's in a happy place.
I wanted to know where the souls of dead pets go, and I found out about Rainbow Bridge.
They say it's a happy place where dead pets become restored to full health. It's a place filled with food, warm sunshine and green pastures. They say that one day, when their owners have to leave Earth, they get to meet them at Rainbow Bridge and they both cross on the other side, which they refer to as Heaven.
Thank you so much for making us happy throughout the whole span of time you stayed with us. Thank you for giving me the "silent" moral support that I always needed. Thank you for keeping me company and listening to all my rants. I'll miss your beautiful eyes, your fat body and your cute bark. I'll miss the way you chase my slippers, the way you bully me so that you can keep the fan all to yourself. I'll always cherish those times when you make pa-cute so that I can give you more food or be more malambing so that I can play with you even if I'm busy. Moreover, I'll miss the way you jump up and down like a brilliant fur ball. Arriving home will never be the same, now that you're not there to welcome me. You are truly one of my best-est friends and please know that I love you so much.
Thank you for fighting your disease as well as you could. You did well, buddy. Now, you have to rest. I'll do my best to set you free, but your memories will always be with me. You'll always be my furry little baby baboy dog. My tears right now will never amount to how much I miss you. Please visit us through our dreams and let us know that you're happy and you're okay. We love you so much. We'll see you in Rainbow Bridge when the time comes. We'll bring you the Santa clothes and we'll play frisbee. Rest well.
"So long gone from your life, but never absent from your heart." - Rainbow Bridge